The sermon at church yesterday was about this, and the song the
choir sang was this song (although this is not my church's choir)
I was sitting there, next to a friend that I have quite a crush on,
wishing I felt comfortable telling her, telling everyone there, about
this part of me, and, not wishing the repercussions, saying nothing.
This song is beautiful, but how can we say we are many parts one
body when the same church that also sang this song refused
baptism to a practicing lesbian (if she had made some kind of vow
of chastity, it would have been fine...) and dismissed from
employment a youth leader who was "outed" against her will. The
man who was directing the choir has openly admitted in his
testimony that he "struggles with homosexual urges" but that he is
doing his best to overcome them and to prove that regularly dates
women.
I want to think that if I told them, they'd realize that GLBT people
are just as talented, called, and loved by God as anyone else, but
seeing this congregational response to previous issues, I feel I
would just be ostracized and made unwelcome in a place that has
become "home" to me. I'm moving in about a month, and
perhaps I'll just exit quietly, stage right.
4 comments:
Oh, it's so hard to know what to do. No one else can tell you-- you have to know it from the inside.
But I hope, when you move, you can find a church home that welcomes you wholeheartedly, just as God made you.
(((ClosetedBaptistLesbian)))
Well put. I've been a worship leader for churches big and small for years. Transitioning kind of put me off the stage, even when my heart towards God came closer than ever. Now, out of nowhere I'm being given to play keys and guitar while leading worship in front of another congregation that's welcoming of everyone, including GLBT people. Maybe God was leading me after all :)
Hi, CBL--
I'm thinking their perspective probably isn't going to change much, in the short term; I echo Cecilia's hope for you about a new church when you move. You could check out the MCC for a while...that'd be safe. :-)
Hug for you.
I'm not at all sure that God is "in charge," at least in the sense that we don't have responsibilities too. I think our primary responsibility is to find out the will of God for ourselves and then do it. Your desire to speak out may well be the promptings of the Holy Spirit, not your own desire, challenging you to take the risk of saying who you really are. The Bible is full of prophets who spoke out at the Spirit's urging, and most of them paid a price for doing that. We LGBT people are no different; there is always a price to pay. But, the price is often greater when we hide who we are and warp ourselves in the process. Whatever you do, Peace be with you.
Post a Comment